Tiny Clenched Fists Raised High

Posted on December 17, 2018 by Jackie Creer

Courtship led to marriage. A few years later we were blessed with a son, and then another. They were the best of friends. My boys were ages four and two when our small family moved from Washington State to a community near Washington DC for Whit’s two-year work assignment.

We spent many family nights at Bertucci’s restaurant in Herndon, Virginia. It was a great Italian place with brick-oven baked pizza. Each time we would go, the waiter would bring the boys a small ball of dough. He told them to make it into any shape they wanted and then he would bake it for them and bring it back ready to eat. He would suggest they make a car or a boat or their favorite zoo animal or whatever else they could imagine. My boys loved this and worked over their dough for quite some time chit-chatting with each other about all great things in their lives while Whit and I were able to catch up with our own adult conversation.

On one particular family night outing, the waiter told the boys that they would have one more minute to finish their shapes and he would be back to collect them and take them to the oven. When the waiter returned he noted their dough was in the shape of a ball. He asked the boys “Didn’t you want to make a shape?”

Brennen spoke for both of them and said with great pride “They’re basketballs!”
Bryson raised both hands in the air with tiny clenched fists and said “Yeah!!”

The waiter smiled and returned ten minutes later with some baked balls of dough not looking much different than the ones that had been initially delivered to our table 20 minutes prior. I had two delighted young boys.

As a young mother, I often felt exhausted in my daily efforts to care for my children, be a good wife, and try to keep the household running smoothly. I continued to pray and read of Christ, but I often felt like I lacked the mental energy to truly progress in my spiritual knowledge of the scriptures. As I tried to serve as Christ did and testify of Him through my actions within my own home and immediate community, I didn’t always feel like I was doing enough…

Perhaps my continued conversion was like a ball of dough. Even though the change was hard to see, and despite my feelings of inadequacy, there was a process of change and improvement happening. The evidence of such was in quiet moments where tiny hands held storybooks of Christ, and little voices, tired at the end of the day, said “Mom, can we read it again?…”

-JC

As I reflect on this experience again today, I ask myself:
Am I faithful and valiant in my testimony of Jesus Christ?
As I strive to become more faithful, do I look for changes in myself?
When I make mistakes, can I change through Christ?