I had reservations… And not the bougie dinner kind-

A few years ago-

I adjusted my blanket to close a gap in coverage. My heated seat was helping my plight, but the air conditioning in the movie theater marking a thirty-degree swing from the outdoor Arizona summer temperatures was overwhelming. We had just become empty-nesters and the rite of passage seemed to come with late-afternoon movies.
I enjoyed the 120-minute escape complete with salty popcorn for dinner and returned home while it was still light outside.
There were no ball games to go to, homework to help with, or late-night chit-chats to stay up for.

This new phase of life was coupled with complicated feelings….
I had reservations…
(And not the bougie dinner kind- I hate those!😉)

Clearly, I forgot to develop skills and hobbies necessary for a smooth transition to life without the day-to-day household responsibility (mixed with joys) of children.
In the years that followed, I worked to develop hobbies and a side hustle, but nothing filled the void in my heart and home.
The kids had left. They took with them their energy, busyness, and yes- even the mess.

And I hated it.

Until…
The new kid came along. ❤️
It was 3 ½ years ago that I changed my thoughts. Or rather she changed them.
A perfect little granddaughter.
As it turns out- I feel better when a mini-human tornado turns a clean room into chaos and a clean floor into a crumb-fest.
Lately- she’s innately manifesting a mannerism of her Dad when he was a kid. I love it! It’s so small and simple and yet the mere thought of it takes me back to years of backyard play and insatiable energy.

Back then- our evening routine always began with me being exhausted. I felt zombie-ish as I mechanically parented through bath time, scriptures, and stories.
Nevertheless, I placed faith in what I hoped was the truth and trudged along.
As the decades passed, I never stopped to wonder if it was worth the time to read scriptures with the kids every night- even and especially on the nights I felt too tired.
We just simply did it.
I needed to believe in something larger than the lens available to me.
Somewhere along the way, the kids had to decide if the stories in these scriptural accounts were true….
If Christ walked the earth and if God was real…
Now- as news reports are filled with calamities and chaos. As a family of adults, we often text chat about a particular event as the promised signs of Christ’s return.

Calmness and peace are part of my daily story.
Not all day, every day-
Yet, it more so defines this season of life.
I’ve deliberately decided that choosing joy is just that- a choice.
And I’m so grateful-
Some moments of some days it’s easier than others.

So if you wonder what’s worth the effort and what’s not…?

If you wonder if your tireless efforts matter?
If you wonder if anything and everything you do that gets undone is worth it?
If you wonder if words on a page become messages written on a young heart?
If you wonder if you’ll miss your little people when they are grown and gone?
It’s all a resounding “YES”.

It’s all hard. It’s all worth it.
And I circle back to one of my all-time favorites…
“Keep loving.
Keep trying.
Keep trusting.
Keep believing.
Keep growing.
Heaven is cheering you on.
Today, tomorrow, and forever.”

Today, my joy is full. Two months ago, we received the next gift from heaven- a grandson.
I’m grateful for the perspective a new life brings and the reminder that any step or thought towards faith in God and His Son, Jesus Christ is worth every tired, mechanical, or zombie-like effort.
My hope is that if you’re in the phase of struggle, use a mirror filled with grace.
Breathe.
And lean on the strength available to you through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. It’s how we get through and “see” what God needs us to know about Him.

2023 has been tough in a million invisible Goliath-filled ways.
But because I’m working to borrow God’s lens a bit better-
It’s also been the most blessed year yet!

Thanks for joining me in Cookies and Christ 2023!!

-JC

(Easy) Lemon Cake Bars

1 lemon cake mix
1/3 cup oil
1/3 cup water
1 cup sour cream
4 eggs
1 small package of lemon pudding

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Combine all in the ingredients and mix until smooth. Pour into a greased 10 x 15 bar pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 28-30 minutes. Remove from the oven and let cool completely. Frost with Lemon Cream Frosting. (A can of prepared lemon frosting will work if you’d like.) Drizzle with Lemon Icing.  Let set. Share.

Lemon Cream Frosting
6 oz. softened  cream cheese
6 Tablespoons soft butter
Zest of lemon
2 Tablespoons lemon juice
½ teaspoon lemon extract
2 ¼ cups powdered sugar
Dash of salt

Cream together cream cheese, butter, and lemon zest with an electric mixer until smooth. Mix in lemon juice, lemon extract, 1 cup of powdered sugar and dash of salt. Mix until smooth. Add remaining powdered sugar and whip on high for 3 minutes. 

Lemon Icing
4 Tablespoons lemon juice
2 cups powdered sugar
Dash of salt

Blend until smooth. Spoon into freezer strength Ziploc until ready to use.