Jelly Roll’s Message of Faith and Hope

I was on my way to the airport for a quick trip to check on my latest work project in AZ when I heard a song on the radio for the first time. Within seconds, I knew its message was deep and what the world needs today. 

“I am not okay
I’m barely getting by
I’m losing track of days
And losing sleep at night
I am not okay
I’m hanging on the rails
So if I say I’m fine
Just know I learned to hide it well
I know I can’t be the only one
Who’s holding on for dear life
But God knows, I know
When it’s all said and done
I’m not okay
But it’s all gonna be alright
It’s not okay
But we’re all gonna be alright”

I found the song by Jelly Roll and lyrics on my phone as I sat at my gate and pondered them and their message of faith and hope. I thought about what bridges the gap between not feeling ok, but everything being all right…?

A few months ago I stayed up late until the sky was especially dark and thus the stars seemed astoundingly bright. 
Is this the heavens people speak of…?
Or to…?

I did. 

I begged God for direction and peace in the journey to follow as I took some faith-needed steps. 
The story is still in its infancy. 
There much I don’t understand. 
A simple answer and what I call my “marching orders” seemed clear and I immediately got to mental and physical work as I proceeded in faith. 

And then nothing.
Months passed. 
Nothing of what I was expecting happened or is happening. 

This is no doubt the adversary’s playground. 
He wants me to doubt my faith. 
He wants me to doubt my answer. 
He wants me to doubt God’s ability to hear me when I pray. 
He wants me to doubt my ability to hear God. 

Where’s God when we don’t feel ok?
Where’s God when the hard feels too much?
Where’s God when loneliness crowds the emptiness?
Where’s God when heartache overwhelms?
Where’s God?

When I use the phrase “This is no doubt the adversary’s playground…”
I should follow that with a truth I quote often. 
“Sometimes you need to change your playmates-
Sometimes you need to change your playground-
And sometimes you need to change both.”

Write that down somewhere. It’s powerful in decision making especially if you’re feeling like the victim in being stuck.
Powerful- because it reminds us of agency and the God-given gift of choice. 

So-
When I’m feeling like my thought process has me on the adversary’s playground-
Here’s what ‘that’ feels like-
Nothing is wrong…At first. I can continue swinging seemingly carefree. I can chase the excitement of a tall swirly slide. I can zip down the monkey bars and run it back without even a momentary worry. 

Until I can’t. Until I realize I’m beginning to adapt to my playmate. Until I’m taking on his personas and attitudes. Until…Happiness eludes me yet my verbiage still proclaims loyalty to God. 
That’s how the adversary’s playground feels. The peace I work for in life feels elusive and hidden under uncompromising weights. And yet- there was no marked event that led me there. 

So then what…?
When I’ve stayed too long and I need to find God…
Where do I look?
How do I find Him?

I have come to know-
He’s been beside me all along. I just chose not to seek the clarity and company required to see Him. 
He’s always right where I left Him…
He also sends His Son to come to me. 

But moving toward light, seeking Him, and allowing the outstretched hand of my Savior to pull me up and out of a faith-struggling funk-  is still a choice. And not always easy to navigate in a darkened scene in a darkened world. 

But HE is always there. 

He kneels beside me. Sends angels to watch me and be with me as I decide which way to turn, whether to replace fear with faith and in the end of the minute, the day or the season of hard…
Heaven bridges the gap and in truth-
Everything IS ok. 

And yet today-
I sit alone with my faith. Hoping I’m doing all I can to keep listening.
Some days I could choose to feel abandoned in my plight to follow God -by God himself. 
But a friend recently said-
“If you find yourself feeling like the Heavens are shut and you are struggling to receive revelation, you are not alone. 
But then-
Hold on.
Hope on.
Believe on.”

So I’m trying to follow his suggestion and thus-
Trying to bridge the gap between me and Heaven. 

Where as I look to God-
I see that Jelly Roll is on point-
“But it’s all gonna be alright”

In so doing, you and I can both work to gather more faith and declare the truth-
“Because of and through Jesus Christ, my Savior, I’m going to be alright!”

As I work to gain this truth, my discipleship calls me to share the message with a struggling world filled with people who need a message of hope and gladness.-
A message with an invitation to “hold on, hope on, and believe on!”

-JC

Caramel Popcorn

1 cup butter
½ cup corn syrup
⅔ cup  granulated sugar
⅔ cup packed brown sugar 
¼ teaspoon salt

Combine all ingredients listed above and bring to a boil. 
Immediately remove from heat and add:

1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon baking soda

Stir until foamy.  Pour onto 18 cups of popcorn (i use pre-packaged kettle corn). Gently fold until evenly coated. Pour out onto a large sheet of parchment paper and let set. Share!