Cookies and Christ

“…Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.”
Mark 9:24

I chose a hard plastic seat near the top of the arena and watched other young women living my dream. 

I had arrived in Provo, Utah a few months earlier, certain of my course.  However, immediately the harsh reality of my financial problems was nearly overwhelming.  Jobs were hard to come by, especially because the sole source for transportation was my own two feet.  With the desperation of a looming rent payment, I took a janitorial position with Brigham Young University.  My job responsibilities centered around scrubbing toilets at the football stadium after games, and an early morning shift at the basketball arena.  At the close of one shift, I heard the comforting familiar sound of bouncing basketballs on a gym floor, the screech of sneakers, whistles, and coach’s calls.  I entered from the hallway to watch for a minute. 

I was faced with a choice.  I could be angry and frustrated with my current course, or hold fast to the truths I had worked to obtain. 

How could I doubt?  And yet, In that moment sitting on a hard plastic seat near the top of the basketball arena, my sadness wandered to thoughts and images from the past year. 

My course still produced a very clear picture:

I saw myself standing at an open locker starring in prayer into the back of it connecting with my Father in Heaven and feeling His love and protection. I saw myself leaving Bishop McDunn’s office and my pause leading the way to see the love in his eyes. I saw myself pouring out my heart to God and knowing my course was to head west. I saw myself guarded and protected and strengthened by an unseen aide on my three-day bus ride. How could I doubt that I was exactly where God wanted me to be?

Peace and pure knowledge of unobstructed love from my Heavenly Father filled me as I silently prayed right there in that moment…

I began to work and draw from the enabling power made possible through the Atonement of Jesus Christ.  I felt like I was in this with Him, and although I still lacked the ability to understand my purpose completely, I held tight in agreeing to just one step in faith.

-JC

Pretzel and M&M Cookies

½ cup soft butter
½ cup buttered flavored Crisco
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 ½ cups all-purpose flour 
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup mini semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 cup mini M&M candies
1 cup broken pretzel pieces

Cream butter, Crisco, and sugars with an electric mixer on medium high for 1 minute or until fluffy. Hand stir in eggs and vanilla extract; don’t over-mix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Stir in chocolate chips and M&M’s. Gently fold in pretzel pieces. Scoop out approximately 24 2” balls of dough.  Gently roll and flatten slightly.  Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet. Press additional pretzel pieces and a few more M&M candies into the top of the cookie disc.
Bake at 375 degrees for 12+ min. Let set. Share!

“…for the Lord hath comforted his people, and will have mercy upon his afflicted.”
Isaiah 49:13

Dad quietly walked around the car I had wrecked while my family was away on a trip. I opted out of the family vacation to Maine, blaming my inability to get days off from my part-time job.

He somberly counted 1..2…3…

I nervously wondered if when he got to a certain number he would begin atypically exploding at me telling me how irresponsible I had been…

He kept counting. No change in tone or volume…4..5…6…

I silently wondered what he was counting as he slowly circled the crumpled metal that used to be the family car.

He stopped at 8 with a bit of hesitation. I glanced up from the hole my stare was creating in the street in front of our home. 

Our eyes met. There was no rage, or disappointment looking back at me. I felt safe. 

“8 what?” I sheepishly asked…

“8 panels…I believe you got all of them…”

I still didn’t understand. My mind raced as I grasped to understand the message Dad was communicating…He then patiently explained to me what a panel on a car was…
I had rolled down a hill…
Literally…
So I guess I wasn’t surprised I had “…got them all…”

He put his arm around me and we walked back inside. 

I didn’t get the importance of his response until I was a parent. I failed plenty of days- reacting and talking without patiently responding. But sometimes as a huge bowl of freshly poured cereal with a generous amount of milk tipped onto the counter, striking every rung of the bar stool on the descent concluding with a splash seemingly reaching every far crack and cranny of my cupboards and grouted tile…

I would remember…

There were 8 panels… and I “got them all.”

It’s exactly how my Savior meets and loves me.  Truths and consequences of mistakes are real, but the Savior’s love and grace work for them all.

-JC

Toasted Coconut Cookies

½ cup soft butter
½ cup buttered flavored Crisco
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
2 teaspoons coconut extract
2 ¾ cups all-purpose flour 
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 cups toasted coconut

Cream butter, Crisco, and sugars with an electric mixer on medium high for 1 minute or until fluffy. Hand stir in eggs and coconut extract; don’t over-mix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Gently stir in toasted coconut. Scoop out approximately 24 2” balls of dough.  Gently roll and flatten slightly.
(For a richer flavor and smoother texture refrigerate or freeze until ready to bake.)
Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet. Bake at 375 degrees for 10+ min.
Garnish if desired with Coconut Glaze and sprinkle with Toasted Coconut.
Let set! Share!

Coconut Glaze
⅓ cup coconut milk
2 cups powdered sugar
1 teaspoon coconut extract
Dash of salt

Blend all ingredients until smooth.

“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”
Philippians 4:13

As a senior in high school, I rounded my sixth lap around the track on a cool spring evening. As I worked to keep pace, breathing became increasingly more difficult. I had been to doctors and had an artillery of different inhalers and inhalant systems. My diagnosis of exercise-induced asthma came as a big disappointment and yet it answered a lot of questions as to why running had been increasingly difficult since moving to Pennsylvania the previous year. There was a heaviness on my chest literally dragging me down. I just wanted to be able to breathe…

Teammates and coaches cheered me on as I passed their locations around the track. The race was long- 2 miles = 8 laps around the track.

I worked to mentally re-energize my mind, legs, and lungs for the final laps, but I wanted to quit…

This was not my first 3200m race and certainly not my last, but it was more notably difficult than any before, and any since.

Sometimes I feel that seemingly same crushing pressure on my chest caused by my thoughts about the tough stuff in life…trials, temptations, mountains to climb…all the good stuff… I may want a quick-fix of relief and may even seek one out through a momentary distraction. However, quitting at any level isn’t an option.

Not for me. I made that decision long ago and despite weaknesses in thought, I want to choose a better way.

I finished the race amongst the top three runners, placing and earning points for my team. I am certain no one watching that day saw how hard that race was for me. I didn’t want to quit because I was losing- I wanted to quit because it was hard – harder than I felt like it should be…

I’ve since learned to better understand the “invisible hards” in my life, knowing they are without a doubt present in the lives of anyone I meet. We all have them. An outward struggle that can be seen by others usually brings empathy, understanding, space, or extra love from anyone in our circle who knows and sees our struggle.

An “invisible hard” is different. Those “hards” are between us and God. Gratefully, a perfect loving Heavenly Father gave the world His Son. The path to finishing the race and triumphing over and through the “invisible hards” is always the same. It begins and ends with recognizing and choosing my Savior as my source of strength. I’m continuing to work to believe that in Him I can literally do all things- especially- and including the “invisible hards”.

-JC

Chocolate Peanut Butter Marshmallow Krispies Cookies

1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
½ cup creamy peanut butter
¼ cup soft butter
10 oz. mini marshmallows
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
¼ teaspoon salt
7 oz. marshmallow creme
6 cups Rice Krispies cereal

Melt chocolate chips, peanut butter, butter, and marshmallows in the microwave or on medium heat. Stir until smooth. Stir in vanilla extract and marshmallow fluff. Gently fold in Rice Krispies. Spoon ¼ cup sized scoops onto parchment. Flatten slightly. Drizzle with a melted Hershey Bar and peanut butter as desired. 
Let set. Share!

“…Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”
Matthew 25:40

Just before the finish line, I pulled back. 

I felt like it was a show of respect and gratitude. My high school teammate had encouraged me to sign up for a race over the summer. 

The morning of the race found us near the starting line. The mood was much different than a high school meet. It was less intense, more carefree and I thrived on the laid-back scene. We had chosen a 10k course. It was a distance I had never competed in before but felt decently prepared to run it on a summer Saturday morning. 

My teammate and I began the race together and ran stride for stride together most of the way. I was surprised I could keep up with her. She was a year older…a great runner, and notably kind… She was known to be quiet and as expected we ran without chatting- just listening to our feet pushing off the pavement as if in unison and our rhythmic breath. 

We crossed the finish line a foot apart. 

Within a few weeks, I received my second-place medal in the mail. I was happy with the t-shirt but the medal was nice, serving as a great memory for a fun race. 
A few days later, my teammate brought me the first place medal. She told me I had earned it too and she wanted me to have it. I resisted but to no avail- she was intent with her motives and resolve. 

Receiving it changed me. It was one of the most selfless acts I had received with no expectation. 

I wondered if I would have done the same thing…
The truth is… probably not…

However moving forward- I wanted to be like her…kind, selfless and as a peer – a standout in showing Christlike love.  
In serving me, she was able to understand what it felt like to serve as Christ- a feeling I’ve learned to prefer…For truly it is better to give than receive.

-JC

Biscoff Cookie Butter Stuffed Biscoff Oatmeal Cookies

¾ cup soft butter
½ cup Biscoff Cookie Butter
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cup quick oats
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon salt

Scoop 24 Tablespoons of Biscoff cookie butter onto 4 small parchment lined sheets and freeze overnight. 
Cream butter, cookie butter, and sugars with an electric mixer on medium high for 1 minute or until fluffy. Hand stir in eggs and vanilla extract; don’t overmix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Scoop out 24 – 2” balls of dough.  Flatten and wrap each cookie disc around a frozen cookie butter scoop. Only remove 6 cookie butter balls from the freezer at a time and work quickly so cookie butter stays cold.  
(For a richer flavor and smoother texture refrigerate or freeze until ready to bake.)
Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet. Bake at 375 degrees for 10+ minutes on a parchment lined baking sheet. Drizzle with melted Biscoff Cookie Butter if desired.
Let set. Share!

“…ye are all one in Christ Jesus.”
Galatians 3:28

Our charter bus was loaded with instruments, gear and members of the marching band as we departed from the school parking lot at 5am on Christmas Day. We were scheduled to spend several days driving from the Midwest to the Southeast part of the United States. 

Our high school band had been diligently practicing with early morning rehearsals and fundraising tirelessly to take advantage of the invitation to march in the Citrus Bowl Parade on New Year’s Day. I had been recruited to join the color guard for a few competitions culminating in a seemingly once in a lifetime trip for a small-town girl in Iowa. 

On the long bus ride, I passed time chatting and listening to music. Once in Florida, we spent the night in a hotel- (a first for me). The city was big, the winter weather was warm and the palm trees looked perfectly constructed. Everything was new and different. 

At midnight,  the night before the parade, we dressed in our uniforms and loaded onto our bus. We were driven to a poorly lit parking lot. The mood was a bit tense. Our chaperones seemed deliberate and yet uneasy. We unloaded our instruments and flags and gathered for instruction. 

The wait would be long. It was nearly 3 am and as instructed by the parade organizers, we mobilized our band to the assigned waiting area. It was an especially dark part of town …
We waited for hours in near silence in loose groups on a narrow side road until we were instructed to gather.
When cued, we took formation.
The drum cadence sounded.
We collectively moved our right feet as one unit- in stepping down the street. 

The drum cadence gave way to our nearly perfectly rehearsed performance in the parade that day.  Our lines were crisp, counts on point, and steps remained as one. Peace replaced our anxious wait. Our chaperones and band director nodded in approval and delight. The loudspeaker announced our band bragging of our accomplishments and size based on the tiny town from which we traveled. 

I felt part of something great that day- something bigger than myself or my contribution.
As a marching band, our steps were as one-
Rehearsed- practiced, and deliberate- and no different than the unifying work of our Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost. It’s similar to how I feel about ministering in their work – united in purpose as one.

Huddled in the dark in Orlando, Florida with my classmates and the ensuing performance helped me understand how we can collectively work together for God. My part is simply one little step, one simple act…

Trusting in a greater outcome than I can see… 

-JC

Oreo Cream Topped Chocolate Sugar Cookie (Chilled)

1 cup soft butter
½  cup vegetable oil
1 ¼ cups granulated sugar
1 ¼ cups powdered sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup cocoa powder
2 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 ½ teaspoons baking powder
½ teaspoon salt

Cream butter, oil  and sugars with an electric mixer on medium-high for 1 minute or until well blended. Hand stir in eggs and vanilla extract; don’t over-mix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Scoop out approximately 24+ 2” balls of dough. Gently roll and flatten slightly.
(For a richer flavor and smoother texture refrigerate or freeze until ready to bake.)
Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet.   Bake at 350 degrees for 10+ minutes. Let cool completely.   Pipe chilled Oreo Cream straight from a Ziploc bag with a 1 inch corner trimmed off.
Refrigerate cookies until ready to serve. Garnish with chopped Oreos or Oreo Thins.
Share!

Oreo Cream
8 oz. softened cream cheese
20 crushed Oreo cookies
16 oz. thawed Cool Whip
Mix cream cheese and Oreo cookies together until well blended. Fold in thawed Cool Whip. Spoon into two different gallon sized Ziploc bags. (This will make it easier to handle.) Refrigerate until ready to use.

“Fear not…be strong and of good courage.”
Joshua 10:25

I pulled my team-issued tube socks all the way up. They climbed past my knees, so I folded them down to mirror the height of the rest of my team. It was the mid-80s… the shorts were short but the socks were tall…
Coach finished his pre-game chat and I followed my teammates out onto the gym floor to finish our warm-up.  As the huddle broke, I took my spot at the end of the bench. It was MY spot. No one told me to sit there. I simply knew I was the worst one on the team and I sat at the end of the bench with no intentions or expectations to see any minutes in the game. My seemingly oversized white and red Pony brand high tops looked brand new at nearly the conclusion of the season. They only wove through the defense crossing over to score a layup in my daydreams. 
I felt lucky enough to be numbered among the team and with those feelings came no expectation to play. 

Our star offensive player was good- really good. She was fun to watch. I wanted to be like her – earning the accolades of the team, coach, fans, and even college recruiters. But for now- I felt complacent as I watched from the end of the bench. 

Late into the season on a road trip, I warmed up with my team still nervous I would miss a wide-open layup in pregame and embarrass myself, my team, and my entire town. (Why was I so dramatic…?) Our team found ourselves on the winning side of most competitions. This was our last regular-season game before postseason tournaments. With just a few minutes left in the fourth quarter and a commanding lead…

Coach called my name. 

I froze…
Literally- I didn’t move…
My sweaty teammate nudged me…
My heart raced…
I slowly looked toward Coach. How embarrassing would it be if I thought he called me to go into the game and he actually just wanted me to reach for a warm-up jacket that had fallen behind me… or something…

I cautiously made eye contact with Coach and he waved me down toward him. He told me who to check-in for. I didn’t even know how to check into a game. The guy at the score table in the visiting town made it easy on me and within a few seconds, I was out on the court hoping the insufficient circumference on my legs would just keep my socks up. 

Play began quickly and I tried to remember my position the best I could. An unexpected pass came my direction. It seemed as though the moves in my head could actually physically be paralleled as I gave my defender a quick fake and dribbled twice to the basket for a layup. 
I got bumped and my 80-pound frame landed behind the basket. As if in slow motion- I looked up to see my shot bounce off the backboard, around the rim, and then in through the net…..

My team erupted in cheers. I couldn’t believe it myself…

I had scored…

It was almost embarrassing how many people congratulated me after the game. I seemed to receive more accolades than our star player who had won the game for us. 
But I felt like I had battled my fears and showed up with strength and courage when I finally made it onto the court. I could have easily received the pass and quickly sent it right back.
But I didn’t.
Nor did I realize at the time how important it would be that I gathered courage at that moment and took a chance. 

Scoring that layup was a caveat towards confidence. Confidence that fueled hard work on the court and eventually in my spiritual quest. 

Within a few years, my legs grew to fill out my tube socks. My confidence grew too as did my faith. It all began with quieting fear, taking myself off the bench, and showing up authentically with courage. 

Truly a pattern of behavior I still deliberately work towards… in life and in growing my faith.

-JC

Dark Chocolate Orange Cookies

1/2 cup soft butter
1/2 cup butter flavored Crisco
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 Tablespoons orange zest 
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 cups dark chocolate pieces

Cream butter, Crisco, and sugars with an electric mixer on medium-high for 1 minute or until fluffy. Hand stir in eggs, vanilla extract and orange zest; don’t over-mix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Stir in dark chocolate pieces. Scoop out approximately 24 2” balls of dough.  Gently roll and flatten slightly.
(For a richer flavor and smoother texture refrigerate or freeze until ready to bake.)
Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet.   Bake at 375 degrees for 10+ minutes. Remove from the oven and immediately drizzle with Orange Glaze.
Let set. Share!

Orange Glaze
2 Tablespoons orange juice
1 cup powdered sugar
Zest of ½ an orange.
Use a food processor to thoroughly mix all ingredients.

“Not everyone that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.”
Matthew 7:21

I had no swag whatsoever… and yet…

As I heard the bass guitar and percussion cadence blare on the speakers and the electric guitar join in, I couldn’t move my fingers fast enough to tie my laces. 

“C’mon Jackie!!!” My friend called as she (more practiced, more coordinated, and more graceful) strode out onto the hardwood rink in her perfectly laced roller skates. 

By the time the lyrics “Let’s go” fueled my adrenaline, I took off in hopes to catch up to my friend by the first turn…
“Are you ready?…
Are you ready for this?”

The music blared and became my anthem as I crossed over gripping the hardwood gaining incredible speed weaving in and out of skaters as I raced toward my friend. 
Ahead of Queen’s verbal cue, I turned the corner WAY too fast. 
I slammed into the handrails hard!

My sixth-grade classmates kept skating and singing as I became a casualty.
My pride was severely bruised as was my hand, and likely my ribs. I metaphorically dusted myself off and waited for my friend to circle around. 
I fought the lump forming in the back of my throat. 
With renewed resolve noting my friend slowing to join up with me I more cautiously finished the lap. 

My friend sang out to the harmonizer beat with a bit of a dance in her skate – “..another one bites the dust…”

This memory keeps cycling through my head as I ponder on the past year.
I still often try to run faster than I am able…
It’s a personality struggle turned to trials, followed by a series of temptations resulting in mistakes that I’m constantly regrouping (repenting) from. 

2020 has at times seen me trying to outrun the chaos, discomfort, and stumbling blocks…
Until I pause to realize they are exactly where they are supposed to be…as am I…

So therein can I exercise greater patience in working to understand my purpose with greater faith in Christ and doing the will of the Father who sent Him and thousands of years later sent me with my own purpose…

My invitation follows that of Christ’s…accompanied by a promise…

And I’m certain that that “kingdom” is a place I want to be! I’ll take my chances and work towards that!

-JC

Mint Chip Cookies

1 cup soft butter
½  cup vegetable oil
2 cups granulated sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon mint extract
A few drops green gel food coloring
3 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 ½ teaspoons baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup mini chocolate chips
1 cup Andes Mints pieces

Cream butter, oil and sugar with an electric mixer on medium-high for 1 minute or until fluffy. Hand stir in eggs, mint extract and food coloring; don’t overmix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Stir in chocolate chips and Andes Mint pieces. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Scoop out approximately 24+ 2” balls of dough. Gently roll and flatten slightly.
(For a richer flavor and smoother texture refrigerate or freeze until ready to bake.)
Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet. Bake at 375 degrees for 10+ minutes.  Garnish with melted Andes Mints and mini chocolate chips, as desired.  Let set. Share!

“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.”
Matthew 5:16

I found a walking stick- not because I needed one for the predominantly flat terrain, but rather it felt more like a hike to carry one along.  A couple of times a year- usually in the spring and fall, Mom would pack a simple picnic lunch and our family would pile into the station wagon and head to Waubonsie State Park located on the Lewis and Clark Historic Trail and a short drive from our home. 

Dad always wanted us to hike to a lookout where four portions of different states could be seen (Iowa, Nebraska, Missouri, and Kansas). The trails and open areas were rarely busy. Occasionally we saw a deer. Dad would want us to be quiet so he could watch it for a bit…

I was mostly unimpressed. 

As far as I was concerned there were only two things good about this family outing…The elephant slide, and an occasional splurge with our picnic lunch that included store brand sandwich cookies. 

I worked my way to the lookout location as quickly as I could, quickly “hiked” back to the picnic area, gulped down lunch, savored my portion of cookies, and waited impatiently hoping to be granted permission to go down the elephant slide. 

The slide was simply a dirt hill. Mom and Dad hated the mess and dust that accompanied the activity. I delighted in being dusty. This area of the park was often busy with other kids. We waited and took turns sliding down the hill making the family trek worthwhile. 

As I got a bit older, I was still usually first to the top of the hill. Dad wanted to talk about what we could look out and see. I was rarely interested in a history lesson. Despite having grown a bit bigger- when I looked out over the plains and farmlands of neighboring states- I felt tiny and insignificant. I truly had no idea how big the world really was- but I felt small in it. 

It gave a quest for answers and perspective on my belief that we are all connected- as sons and daughters of God. 

And what about me? Did my part in the grand scheme of things even matter?

That’s the journey I was on and the thoughts I was trying to sort through. 

A verse in one of my favorite hymns spoke of light. It resonated with me. If God was light and I’m His daughter – what does the request to let my light shine mean? I’ve learned over the years the specific tasks associated with how that light shines change from season to season. 

But as I simplify it for me, it’s to lift where I stand and light the little tiny realm around me. I’ve seen the light of others as it comes into my life when I don’t even realize how much I need it. 

Looking out at the four corners was cool- for a minute…Recognizing my place in this world and my infinite value to a Father in Heaven who created me- took time. 

To this day- I’m not so good at long pauses to gain perspective. I typically move quickly from one arena in my life to the next all while being dusty and delighted. 

I’m working to slow down in the good ways – recommitting to send the light of Christ through the things I do.

-JC

Orange Creamsicle Sugar Cookies (Chilled)

1 cup soft butter
½  cup vegetable oil
1 ¼ cups granulated sugar
1 ¼ cups powdered sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon orange extract
3 ⅔ cups all-purpose flour
1 ½ teaspoons baking powder
½ teaspoon salt

Cream butter, oil  and sugars with an electric mixer on medium-high for 1 minute or until well blended. Hand stir in eggs and orange extract; don’t overmix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Scoop out approximately 24 -2” balls of dough. Gently roll and flatten slightly. 
(For a richer flavor and smoother texture refrigerate or freeze until ready to bake.)
Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for 10+ minutes. Let cool completely.  Generously pipe Orange Cream straight from a Ziploc bag with a 1 inch corner trimmed off. Refrigerate until ready to serve. Garnish with fresh orange if desired.
Share!

Orange Cream
1 cup boiling water
6 oz. orange flavored gelatin powder
24 oz. thawed Cool Whip

Mix boiling water and gelatin in the food processor until gelatin is dissolved. Fold in Cool Whip.  Spoon into two different gallon sized Ziploc bags. (This will make it easier to handle.)

“…remember all the way which the Lord thy God led thee these forty years in the wilderness, to humble thee, and to prove thee, to know what was in thine heart…”
Deuteronomy 8:2

We toted a full load of cinnamon rolls in our wagon and headed for the motor homes just beyond our house. 

It was rodeo week and I lived in a rodeo town: Sidney, Iowa – Home of the Championship Rodeo. I’m not sure how the rest of the world felt- but to the residents of our town- we were a big deal…

Rodeo week was the best week of the year! There was a large parade around the town circle and each performance kicked off with a cannon where they sent a toy on a parachute high into the sky. A few of us neighborhood kids would try and track it and chase it down. On the weekend nights, I would lay awake in my bed and listen to the twanging country music as I drifted off to sleep. 

On this particular day- Mom had been preparing her Sweet Rolls. She nicely packaged each foil pan and carefully stacked them in the wagon. We went “door-to-door” to sell them to the rodeo fans who came for the week and camped out in their motorhomes in the large field between our home and the rodeo arena. It was not my favorite “Littlefield Girl” project. But I wanted to benefit from it ($$$$$), so I combed my hair, brushed my teeth, complied with (mostly) clean clothes, and trekked with my sisters to find our buyers. 

Mom thought it would be nice if we sang a primary song we had learned at church to those who purchased from us. I was dramatically completely mortified by the idea. I’m not sure why… I enjoyed primary- and although I clearly possessed the non-singing talents in the family of singers, I still enjoyed learning and singing the primary songs… But those were for church and it was an August morning in my neighborhood…

I was clearly NOT AT CHURCH!

I’m not sure which emotion was stronger- my embarrassment in singing songs of Christ while pulling a wagon full of sweet rolls to be exchanged for cash, or my shame of being embarrassed about singing of Christ. 

It wasn’t the wilderness…It had not been 40 years…but I felt humbled by my circumstances. I knew what was in my heart- absolutely zero courage in sharing my beliefs in Christ through song to complete strangers.  

I complied with the project and barely whispered as my sisters sang out with heart. We eventually emptied the wagon and counted our cash back home.  I couldn’t delight in our progress ($$$$). I knew I needed to rewrite what was in my heart…

It wasn’t easy for me (and still isn’t) to share what I hold dear regarding my thoughts on my relationship with Jesus Christ. Perhaps it’s because I know that many are better scriptorians and better at emulating the ways of Christ.  I reside on the inferior side of both groups.  Surely they are those who are more qualified and interesting to hear from.  

In sharing, I’m striving to better become “all in” with my discipleship of Jesus Christ.

-JC

Brown Butter Sugar Cookies with Brown Butter Icing

1 cup butter, browned and cooled
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 ⅓ cups all-purpose flour
1 ½ teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt

Heat butter in a saucepan on medium low until it foams and turns brown. Remove from heat and let cool. Cream butter and sugars with an electric mixer on medium-high for 1 minute or until well blended. Hand stir in eggs and vanilla extract; don’t overmix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Scoop out approximately 24 -2” balls of dough. Gently roll and flatten slightly. 
(For a richer flavor and smoother texture refrigerate or freeze until ready to bake.)
Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet. Bake at 375 degrees for 10+ minutes. Top with Brown Butter Icing. 
Let set. Share!

Brown Butter Icing

½ cup butter, browned and cooled
¼ cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Dash of salt 
2 ¾ cups powdered sugar

Heat butter in a saucepan on medium low until it foams and turns brown. Remove from heat and let cool. Combine the remaining ingredients and use a food processor or electric mixer to blend thoroughly.

“…Be not afraid, only believe.”
Mark 5:36

I slipped out the back door of the old house where we went to church.

It didn’t have a large parking lot nor a steeple…

It was simply an old house. There were chairs set up in rows, a podium, and bedrooms upstairs set up as classrooms.

It’s the place our family came each Sunday to worship and learn of Christ. We returned mid-week for children’s classes. It was there that I was taught of baptism and confirmation, and given the gift of the Holy Ghost. I understood this gift to be a power to know things, a direct link with God, even the automatic answer to my prayer that I desperately sought that day. 

I received a present following my baptism and confirmation- a pretty necklace. 

As quickly as I received it-
I had lost it. 

A few of my sisters and I had been in the backyard playing and upon returning inside I noticed my necklace was missing. I prayed for help in finding it and returned outside to a large yard of thick long grass. I tried to retrace my steps and steady my gaze hoping the sun would reflect off of the shiny necklace divulging its secret hiding place. I prayed and prayed and prayed as I walked in tiny rows back and forth across the lawn. 

After a while- Mom called me inside. It was time to go home. I somberly went inside and gathered with my sisters, then climbed into the family station wagon. 

I wondered in sadness what I had done wrong. I had prayed for help and thought for sure the Holy Ghost was supposed to tell me where my necklace was. 

It didn’t work. 

I didn’t lose faith or belief in God or the Holy Ghost… But rather I lost a bit of faith in myself- in my ability to feel “it”… to make “it” work right. 

As I look back- that belief system was a stumbling block that would grow bigger as I got older and my problems got tougher. I didn’t realize then that the problem wasn’t me – that God didn’t create me worse than others- incapable of feeling His Spirit, or with an inability to pray the right way. However, I thought the problem WAS me… that I was just plain wrong…

Oh, how I wish I could go walk with that girl in her tiny methodical lines in the backyard of the “church.”

I wish I could take her by the hand and look straight into her bright blue eyes and tell her she’s perfect just the way she is. 

I wish I could tell her that there aren’t always obvious reasons for seemingly unanswered prayers but it doesn’t mean we did it wrong or that prayer doesn’t work. 

I wish I could tell her to take her selfless, faith-filled angel mother by the hand and ask for help…

I would certainly hold her tight and beg her to keep trying, keep trusting, and keep believing. 

Perhaps I was blessed by angelic urging that day to not quit on faith- in all unseen ways. The path forward was bumpy and ugly at times, but over 40 years later-

I understand that fear of failing in God’s ways never truly wins. 

I need “only believe…”

-JC

Pretzel and Fudge Chocolate Sugar Cookies

1 cup soft butter
½  cup vegetable oil
1 ¼ cups granulated sugar
1 ¼ cups powdered sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup cocoa powder
2 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 ½ teaspoons baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
4 oz. pretzels, broken or cut into small pieces

Cream butter, oil  and sugars with an electric mixer on medium-high for 1 minute or until well blended. Hand stir in eggs and vanilla extract; don’t over-mix. Add dry ingredients all at once and mix until fully incorporated. Add 2-3 Tablespoons more flour for high elevation. Scoop out approximately 24+ 2” balls of dough.  Roll slightly and press into broken pretzel pieces. Place on greased or parchment paper on an aluminum cookie sheet.   Bake at 375 degrees for 10+  minutes. 
Let cool slightly. Top with Fudge Frosting. Sprinkle with Sea Salt.
Let set. Share!

Fudge Frosting

3/4 cup whole milk
2 1/4 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 teaspoon vanilla extract  Dash of salt Melt chocolate chips into milk in the microwave. Add vanilla extract and salt; stir until smooth. Let cool until room temperature.